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Can You Make Small Talk?

Updated: Oct 10, 2022

This is a huge undertaking and almost impossible for some!


Why is this so difficult for many of us?

Here are a few popular reasons:


  1. We don't know what to say.

  2. We are afraid of strangers - Childhood adage 'stranger - danger!'

  3. You or someone you know has had bad, really bad experiences.

  4. It's safer to talk only to friends and family.

  5. Why bother?

These are all legitimate reasons.


Where do we have the opportunity to speak to strangers?


  1. At our work place

  2. At school, continuing education

  3. At the Grocery or Hardware Store or the Mall

  4. Neighborhood

  5. Exercising at the Gym

  6. Church

  7. Walking for exercise or with our dog

  8. Waiting in a movie or amusement or grocery line

  9. Volunteering

  10. Errands, Post Office - Banking - Library - Drugstore

Let's end Lesson One with this homework: When you are out and about - make eye contact with everyone! And smile at the same time! You can mumble, 'How are you?' or What a nice day! or Eeks! It's raining and I didn't bring my umbrella.


What you will learn with this homework is:

  1. That people, most people are happy to smile back and nod their head in greeting.

  2. It's not that hard. If you are not accustomed to this it will feel impossible. Start with keeping your head up - making eye contact and smile without saying anything.

  3. Do this until you are comfortable with this (smiling with your head up).

  4. Review how you feel. Does it feel good? Does it feel bad? Why?

  5. By all means, journal about your experience. Is it getting any easier? Do you fell safer when you are quiet and alone? What is so scary about strangers?

Next time:


  1. Is stranger/danger for real?

  2. Why do we need to be friendly?

  3. Aren't we just asking for trouble?

Thank you for spending time on this difficult, maybe impossible skill development. I hope you will give it a try. Smiling is contagious! xoxo Lynda






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